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Confession of Atykah Aura
Just don't give up.


Name Atykah i'm just like a normal people who love to write. Just be nice.

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Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Assalammualaikum readers,

i wrote again. i confessed about how i felt again... i don't know the feeling when someone in love with you, never showed anything at all or its me? he never convinced his heart to love me. i don't think he even proved any of it. mungkin ani adalah ujian. sejauh mana kitani as a fergille human beings kena uji tentang hati dan perasaan. i tried my hard but i don't know is it enough? it's totally hurt. i'm kind of someone who thinks too much or being possessive or mentally worried.. its so complicated.. kadang-kadang apa yang kitani harap ia berlaku, inda sama dengan reliti atas pengharapan yang kitani fikirkan. sebab atulah kitani akan merasa sakit dan terluka. this is not a myth. this is true! never expected anything from the guy we loved will show what you want in your mind. hahahaha.. its really hurt broken. i did love him and i did thank him for everything he did to me. at least the part when he said he fell in love with me. seriously for all confession he was saying to me please la don't base it anything on lie. please showed it. please cared for me. i want that from you. convince my heart to love you back. make me happy. what you always do is break my heart. and its hurt. you almost make me cry. what is that? please.... 

how can i understand you, when you never understand what i really want. how? i did understand your limited space on your work. i did understand that you love your family more than i do, i did understand your complicated minds. semua tu lebih baik mengalah daripada berkelahi, merajuk, ambil hati kah. i tried my hard for being patient and understanding. tapi sampai bila? selama-lamanya? sampai kahwin? stupid. Ya Allah apakah ini semua? tapi apa yang perlu dilakukan ialah tabah menghadapi segala cobaan hati dan perasaan because we can't read people minds... we can't understand what people want more than what we understand our self. then of course help me here............................................................................

ok. this is what you should do. 

I should remember this 15 ways to keep relationship working... everyday. oh yes. remember number five. when you get hurt just forgive and forget. how about number seven? ohh thats sound like me. never say it's okay even when it's not... wow! i always said it was all okay but the fact that it was not okay. i wish you can read this hahaha. but i never share my blog to him. i just let him to find it by himself. this is me. yang penting di sini i want a relationship when he loves me, he means it. when he loves me, his intention is to marry with me someday. in syaa Allah jika ada jodoh... Ya Allah bantulah hamba, satukan hati lelaki ini dengan hati hamba. semoga dipermudahkan semuanya. 

hahahaha.... this is so amusing.. how can he will treat myself like a princess? i don't think so. hahahaha... i don't know...i don't have any idea about this regardless he always make me unhappy (well, not whole but most) lebih baik jadi kawan saja dulu daripada ia bagitahu hati dan perasaan nya. walaupun i want that. tapi sudah ia bagitahu segala isi hatinya. macamani plang jadi nya. awkward and hurt! the more i think about him the more i hurt.... but i do love him. i never lie what i feel toward him... my heart will go on and on...

P.S: today is his birthday. believe it or not, i still not greeting him yet. believe it or not yesterday i was waiting his text for whole night but he didn't text me back and i was like "what happened? did i do something wrong again? is he going to write a letter? believe it or not he actually online. he updated his Facebook and i was like omg! whyyyyy???? ok then i just ok.. lets forget thing and just listened to Celine Dion's song instead. malas mau fikir. until tomorrow at 8am i guess. he texted and his sorry for the late reply? and he's at the office already... bravo... i like the way you treat my heart like that. it was hurt dear you... you almost make me cry and i hate crying but you did! why? are you trying to challenge me? it was not funny! however, i still want to give him a chance. and i want him to call me tonight. kalau banyak alasan nya sampai seribu kah apa... ok its time for me to shut myself off from him for a week (hope so) hahaha... and tell him to give me some space to calm myself down. thats it. so let wait and see what is happening tonight.... 

heartbroken writer,


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